Apr

Disappearance of Lincoln Bust Solved ~ 30 years later

Hermon MacNeil’s bust of Abe Lincoln DID NOT go out for a walk in 1979. It WAS KIDNAPPED! [Since the bust has no legs, we thought the original “walk and fresh air” story was bogus in the first place.]

Holly Koreb, Senior Director, of the Office of Communications and Marketing at U of I’s College of Liberal Arts and Sciences, confirmed our suspicions in a message today. She has informed us (within the hour) that a public confession has been posted in audio on the LAS website. [ www.lincolnhall.illinois.edu/storyography ]

Artist's rendition of the NEW Security system for Lincoln bust! Looks rather flimsy from here.

The anonymous culprit ‘claims’ to be a member of a group of ‘supposed’ pre-professionals who eventually formed themselves into the notorious Statue Liberation Society (hereafter the ‘S.L.S.’).

This student, now an alumnus, garbles on for 7 minutes and 22 seconds [ in a disguised voice] about a harmless prank that resulted in the kidnapping of the 16th President from his prominent perch in the circular stairwell of Lincoln Hall.

The disguised culprit, now in his seeming mid-life repose, says in part: “We alerted University police [of the bust’s whereabouts], and certainly we were not responsible for any damage or any scratches that appeared later.” —anonymous member of the Statue Liberation Society

This statement of ‘non-responsibility’ emits fumes of self-satisfaction, deception and a possible lack of understanding of “good clean fun”. (While we will defer to qualified historians of Illini lore for details on this organization, it does seem to be a post-incident fabrication to cover pranks that escalated to grand theft – not to mention the heinous act of kidnapping of a dead president.)

But in a conciliatory effort to NOT rub S.L.S. ‘noses’ in their infamous-hidden past, but to offer instead, a ‘fresh’ renovation to student life, we at HermonAtkinsMacNeil.com propose:

That the Statue Liberation Society (S.L.S.) anonymously raise a challenge-reparation of $50,000 to be contributed to the existing ‘Lincoln Hall Scholarship Fund’.
That these donations be met and exceeded by matching gifts from the faculty, staff, alumni and students of U of I.
That the S.L.S. then be invited to shed their cloak of anonymity in a true ‘Lincoln-Douglas’ style of honesty.
And that a spirit of ‘New Beginning’ be initiated by all parties with a rub of Lincoln’s refurbished nose in his new perch at the dedication of the new Lincoln Hall.